Waking Up in Pain

Nothing puts me in a crappier mood than starting the day with a migraine. I know that I’ll be able to get rid of the migraine, I have a variety of medications at my disposal and at least one of them will do the trick. But, it means all day I have to be careful so that it doesn’t come back. I just took some sumatriptan and I’m sure within the hour I’ll feel better, but at this point my stash is getting very small. For some reason the insurance companies have no problems with me amassing huge quantities of pain killers (which can be addictive and cause other problems), but they are so stringent about the amount of migraine-treatment medication you can get. The theory is that you shouldn’t get more than X number of migraines a month (usually 9 pills worth), and if you do, you should be getting some sort of treatment to prevent them. This is great in theory, but horrible in practice. Some migraines take more than one dose to go away, many migraines return within 24 hours and need new meds and even when migraines are under control, you can have a bad patch due to other factors (environmental, increased stress, etc.). It’s so frustrating being in pain all the time. I really hope the prophylactic meds will help, the ones I’m taking I’ve taken before and they have always worked… but eventually they stop and then I start playing medication roulette again. I hate that I’ll be taking medication the rest of my life just so I’m not in pain. My biggest fear of all, is that I have passed this curse on to my daughter. I want her to be happy, I want her to know great joy in life, I hope she turns out to be a wonderful person. My biggest wish, is that the migraines that have plagued, me and my mother and other women in our family … well, I would give anything for her to never know a single day of migraine pain.

It’s just after 7 and Bella and R are still sleeping. She went to bed pretty easily last night around 10pm. She was up to eat at midnight. I can’t remember if there was a time in between, there must have been, but I know she ate at 4:45 too. She was really good while the Professor and K were her. She didn’t nap like she should have, but she was in good spirits (which can be unusual for her in the evening). It was probably because she had taken a nearly 3 hour nap earlier yesterday after being up for 3.5 hours straigh.

It was nice to have the Professor and K over. They didn’t stay all that long, just 5:30 – 9:30. But we had some lamb on the grill and K brought some nice mead and the red velvet cheesecake I made turned out alright.

Today is a day for running errands. I need to go to Wally World to stock up on food for the fur babies and hit the grocery store for food for the week. Of course I don’t feel like doing anything at the moment, but the meds will kick in soon and hopefully I’ll feel up to making breakfast.

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About snarkysillysad
A former marketing professional with 15 years of experience in the technology industry. Through her blog she has shared her journey through pregnancy and motherhood as well as her struggle with migraines, depression, and chronic pain

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